#214 | Pregnancy is the Biggest Rite of Passage (For Me)
About This Episode
At the time of recording this episode, I was five months pregnant. Interestingly enough, it was only last week when I finally shared the news of my second pregnancy on social media.
This time around, I didn’t feel that need to share “the pregnancy announcement” the way I felt it the first time. This second pregnancy feels more personal. I’m in a different stage of my life, my business, my journey as a woman.
We always knew we wanted a second child but we didn’t know when and how. We were surprised at how quickly we got pregnant, even the second time around. It got me thinking about how much of the fertility problems we see in the world today are similar to the toxic masculinity problems (perpetuated by the media and the huge industry that’s grown around it). I haven’t done any research into this, so I’m not sure, but it’s an interesting thing to consider.
The first trimester was tough. I had terrible nausea which, if you’ve ever experienced that, is proof that the 50/50 approach to relationships doesn’t work because it leaves me — the woman, the wife, and the mother — at a disadvantage and at a loss despite what the feminists proclaim.
I got through it with a lot of help from my husband, my mother-in-law, and my team. I delegated a lot, but I still had to show up, so I took naps, went to yoga, rested as much as I could. Even then, there were days when I just couldn’t do anything at all.
Of course, when 16 weeks hit everything felt great again in my body, but now it’s preparing for my maternity leave. It’s training my team to work without me and focus on client success. It’s delegating. It’s getting ready to take three months off.
As a businesswoman, these are the considerations we have to make. And it’s hard because we don’t want to pause. But unfortunately, or fortunately, as I like to think of it… we have to recognize the seasons and cycles of our lives.
On top of that, we’ve been planning for our move to Byron Bay from Canberra and I’ve been feeling the uncertainty that comes along with the excitement of moving location and starting a new life, away from everything that’s familiar and safe. Especially as a pregnant woman what I’m craving most now is safety, so that’s hard, but it’s also going to be amazing.
Then there’s preparing for the birth itself, which is… oh my god, a whole other story. I’m going for a home birth, which feels natural to me, even though I had a difficult experience last time around being induced and going into hospital.
So, I’ve got a doula and a private midwife this time around which is something I highly recommend. I’ve done a lot of research and I’m feeling confident about the safety of home birth compared with hospitals, with what my body can do, that what I’m experiencing is not a medical “condition” that I need a doctor to look at. It’s true that anything can happen, but this is my plan, as controversial as it may be for some people (my own family included).
If you have any questions about what I’ve learned on this journey of pregnancy and motherhood, my team and I are available on Instagram. DM us anytime and we’ll get back to you.
- How motherhood cracks us open — my interview with Kate Leiper